For my delivery, I decided I wanted to go natural and was successful. I have a few friends that told me if I was able to do it, they wanted the whole story, so here it is. For the record, I don't think that it is bad to get an epidural, I just didn't want to get one myself. I spent a lot of time learning about non-medicated pain relief, Lamaze, and talking with other people who had gone natural. I also was told how important it is to have a good coach there to support you and Tanner was amazing. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but I would definitely do it again. You have been warned in advance of what this is about, so don't read on if you don't want the gory details.
On Wednesday I worked a 12 hour shift. I had been down the day before because I was so eager for Eric to come and felt like it was imminent, but he just wasn't having it. So after work Wednesday I conceded to myself that this baby wasn't coming until he was ready and as long as he was healthy, that was all that mattered. I got home, took a shower, ate some dinner, and just relaxed for a while. I had the next day off, so I wasn't in a hurry to get to bed. Tanner finally finished his homework, and we got ready for bed. I was climbing into bed and arranging all my pillows when I heard a small 'pop!' and then felt a HUGE gush of fluid soaking our bed. I started yelling for Tanner, who just stood in the doorway in disbelief. I told him to get me a towel quick, and he came back with two paper towels. Priceless! So I run to the bathroom, trying not to hose down our entire apartment and jump in the tub. I got an intense adrenaline rush and started shaking like a leaf, I couldn't get myself to calm down. I just stood in the shower trying to slow down my breathing and tell myself this was it, it was really time. Part of me felt relief and another part wanted to just panic. Tanner was in a panic trying to grab all our stuff for the hospital and kept asking me if I was serious that my water broke and I didn't just pee myself.
I wasn't having any contractions yet, so I took some time to get ready and get dressed. I called the doctor to make sure I should go in and she told me I should head there right away and she would call the hospital so they would be ready for us. So we grabbed our things and got to the hospital a little after midnight. I had heard of so many people going to the hospital and being sent home, I was just praying that wouldn't happen to us. And the fact that I wasn't having contractions made me worry they would tell us to come back later. But they admitted us and tested my pad I had on, which was positive for amniotic fluid. They didn't want to check me because my water had already broke so I wasn't sure how dilated I was yet. They told me if I wasn't starting to have some definite contractions by 5 am they would start me on Pitocin. So Tanner and I settled in for what we had been waiting for and tried to take in the fact that we were going to meet our baby soon. The nurse asked if I wanted an epidural, I told her I would prefer not to, within reason.
About 1 am I started having contractions. They weren't bad, just like regular menstrual cramps. They set in pretty quickly, they had hooked me up to the monitors and the measurements for my contractions were already only 5 minutes apart. The nurse did a quick ultrasound to make sure he was headdown. He was, but he was facing the wrong way, which usually means you'll have back labor, but luckily, I wasn't having any back pain. They started getting stronger and I started using my breathing to take my mind off of it. The nurse told me I really needed to sleep and rest while the contractions were still mild since I had worked all day and hadn't slept. She gave me some pain medication to help me sleep through the contractions. I dozed off and on for about an hour. Tanner was in the room finishing a homework assignment. I woke up and starting feeling the contractions again, but they were manageable, so I just breathed through them and tried to relax in between them. Lamaze may seem silly, but breathing and relaxation techniques really are what got me through the pain. There are three stages of breathing, I was still on the first, you change to the next one once one isn't working anymore. Around 4 am the contractions were getting more intense and I couldn't rest through them, I had to take more focus through each one. The nurse came in about 5 and suggested I take more pain medication to try and get more rest before the intense part.
I took the medication, but at this point all it did was make me groggy between the contractions, but it didn't take any of the pain away during the contractions. The nurse decided to check me, I was dilated to 5 cm. She said I was progressing well and wouldn't need the pitocin. Not long after this, I had to move on to the second breathing technique. At first it was working great and focusing on my breathing and focal point really took my mind off the pain, it was so motivating. I didn't realize it at first, but I was having a harder time staying in the bed because I was having lower back pain and shooting pains down my legs; the back labor was starting. I asked the nurse if I could please walk around, so from 6 to 645, the nurse let me off the monitor to get up. It helped my back and leg pain so much to get up, but it was hard walking and breathing through the contractions. I eventually had to get back in bed and just focus on breathing and getting through the contractions. I had to just take each one one at a time and relax in between.
Now the back labor was hitting strong and I had to really focus and get my mind off the pain. I had to focus on my breathing and rock myself at the same time to take the pressure off my back. Eventually I sat up and Tanner put counterpressure on my back while I went up another level for my breathing. The nurse Sherrie wanted to check me again, this was around 715. She checked and I was already to an 8! I just told myself things were moving along and to keep going. I also realized that this was it, I wasn't going to give in and have an epidural, because I no longer had that option. The pain was so intense I lost my focus a couple of times and just wanted to stop, but then I remembered that there was no other choice and I pulled it back together. Tanner was amazing. He was right there, pushing on my back, feeding me ice chips, and kept telling me how good I was doing and I could do it.
Around 8, they had Dr. Laine come in and she checked me again. She said I was at a 9, but my cervix needed to dilate more so it wouldn't tear. She asked if I was having the urge to push, which I wasn't, so I just said okay and kept going. About two minute after she walked out, the urge to push hit me. I have never felt anything so intense. Sherrie told me to resist it and just keep breathing. Tanner held my hand and started counting and breathing with me to keep me focused. After ten minutes, I told Sherrie I just had to start pushing, it was too much. She told me to hold off for three more contractions, she would get the doctor and I could start pushing. It literally took everything I had, Tanner and I laugh about it now, but I was gripping the side of the bed during those contractions, he he hooing and praying I could make it to the end. The contractions were literally on top of each other now, so looking back, those three contractions were probably only five minutes total.
Dr. Laine came in a prepared everything while I was breathing through the last contraction. She began explaining to me how I was going to push and get myself into position. I sat up slightly and waited for the contraction to start. I felt it coming and got ready. I had thought pushing was going to be the hardest part, but it actually felt good to be able to push. It was exhausting at the same time, but in some ways it was the best part because it was a relief. I was so tired at this point though from being up for so long that I realized after each contraction I was falling asleep. I would suddenly wake up when I felt the next contraction coming on and see they were all looking at me. It was actually a good thing though because it helped me really relax between contractions and it's funny looking back. Tanner admitted to me later that he didn't think I was going to have the strength to push him out because I was so exhausted. He also said he was worried because I was pushing so hard my face was purple. I did end up after delivery with bruising under my eyes because the blood vessels burst in and under my eyes from the pressure. Dr. Laine, Sherrie, and Tanner were all encouraging me so much and each push telling me to give a little more and push a little harder. It was so exhausting, but when Tanner told me I pushed for 45 minutes, I couldn't believe it, because it seems like it went by faster than that.
She told me I was finally getting close and I was just wondering when he was going to come out. I knew it when his head was getting close; my friend had prepared me for it, she called it the 'ring of fire,' and told me when I felt it, I just had to push through it. I had a feeling this was it and just kept pushing as hard as I could. It started getting more painful, but I just kept telling myself to push through, it was almost over. As his head and shoulders came out, that was probably the most painful moment of labor, (I found out later I got a second degree tear) I actually ended up yelling as he came out, but before I knew it, I felt him come out. I fell back on the bed and nearly fell asleep again, until suddenly I felt them put him on my chest and heard his sweet cry. I looked at Tanner, who looked amazed and had tears in his eyes. I instantly felt an intense rush unlike anything I had ever felt. I watched Tanner cut the cord, they dried him off and put him against my skin. I looked at him and he opened his eyes and we just stared at each other, I couldn't help but just cry, it was one of the most amazing and happy moments of my life.
Peoples' first question to me is would I do it again, and yes, I would. It was painful of course, it's labor, but I kept telling myself it would get worse, and by the end I realized I could handle the worst and that it would end. Having Tanner there and being such an amazing support was really what got me through, again, he really was amazing. I was lucky that my labor went so quickly, otherwise I don't know if I would have had the energy to make it. But after labor, I was stitched up and changed, and I was able to stand right up and get in the wheelchair to go to my new room. Then I was able to get up and go to the bathroom, I walked down for the first bath and got to watch, and though I was pretty sore the day of, by the next day I was feeling really good. Also, the rush of energy I got from all the endorphins after delivery was so great, I might have looked bad, but I felt really good. Eric was so alert right away too, I felt such a connection. That was my experience, sorry this is the longest post ever, but hopefully it helps those that were wondering more about it.
Our sweet little Eric was born Thursday, February 3, 2011, at 9:04 am. He weighed in at 6 lbs. 9 oz. and was 20.5 inches long. We couldn't have imagined how it would feel to finally meet our little man and hold him in our arms. We just can't stop staring at his little face and snuggling him, he is absolutely perfect. He has Tanner's brow bone and his mouth, we're not sure whose nose. He is a grunter and makes us laugh with his constant little noises.
